Saturday, October 16, 2004
Plz understand...
ok first of all, if anyone of you is readin my blog
you HAVE to be open-minded to my comments and thinking and feeling
cause there are true to me and i have no regret sayin them
if some of my blog entries are offensive,it is casue i was very pissed or FUk up that day
and moreover sometimes it is a one time thing....or one day thing
so if i was fuked up on that day that i wrote my blog
i am sorry
thats is all i can say
if u cant accept the fact
den i am really damn sorry
and maybe u should be even readin my blog.
if u view this as a personal attack den so be it
i have said wat i want to say and i will not erase it
moreover, today it is a SATURDAY, which means i am quite pissed or any other days that i am workin.
so sorry again...if i hurt anyone feelings
Sorry.
JooL at 1:30 PM
3 comments
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
Cold am i?
" u r nice towards the other frens. but u r quite cold towards me sometimes. Don't know if its true, but i can feel it. Don't know why the reason is, but just want to let u know."
hmm..
cold am i?
really am i cold?
anyway i noe whu u are
but i am not sayin cause i am
not that type of ppl, since you tik
that i am cold to u den i shall be cold to
everyone. i mean if i am not treatin someone
friendly enuff den i not doin my job of bein fair
to everyone. i mean now that i am workin like fukin
tired at work and i come bac to see this on my blog man
everytime i try to make the ppl ard happy even thou i may
be tired or wat..but i still try to make someone smile but there
is someone out there whu tik i am not good enuff... like i scarific so
much for wat...nothing...i mean i give and help ppl so much and wat do i
get back....nothing....not even a thank you...and u wan to be angry with me?
i am the sort of person who wan to be thank after i done something for you. that
is me... there is nothing i can do... i can be there if u need help...i will help u....i will be
there if u are down....but i expect to be thanked...anyway when i died u dun hav to be there.
another reason well maybe i dun like u and u remind me of my parents...always fightin and arguin...u always beat ppl....den it is just like wat my mom does to me....as if i dun get enuff of that at home...and i hav to suffer the same thing in school too...i mean WAT THE FUk... if i wan to get hit or beaten i rather do it myself and commit sucide...zzzzzzzzz
maybe another reason is that i am not attracted to you...got a problem? u look like my mom big and fat... so wat are you goin to do abt it?....HIT me? beat me? i can hav my limits but if u overblow it den thats it...i will hate u for the rest of my life....and i will do stupid things....
anyway are you jealous of me? that i am tokin to others other than u?...FINE u can tok to them for all u wan and i will not tok with them....i couldnt care less....even thou how i wan to tok to them or maybe make a few friends....FOR YOUR GOD DAMN SAKE, i will not tok to them at all...u can tok to them alll u wan....
SO TO ANYONE READIN THIS IF U WAN TO COMMENT ON MY BLOG...WHICH IS A PART OF ME AND MY DIARY OF THOUGHTS HERE....MAKE SURE TO KEEP IT TO YOURSELF....IF U GOT SOMETHING BAD TO SAY....even if it is bad jus put it in a nice way...
wat can i ask for more?
Bitch. Peace out.
"JO_oL'
JooL at 7:27 PM
2 comments
Friday, October 08, 2004
A ghostly encounter...
hello everyone readin this...i have to let you all noe that i have to write wat i have to say and experience casue i feel that it is the rite thing to do...if you are scared or feelin uneasy now, i suggest that you read this later when you are feelin okay... and lastly, i was am not able to recall most of the thing cause like a dream after 15 mins...10% of the dream have been forgotten....and i am able to recall this cause i believe that i have a high willpower and menatl ablilty that i was able to control some of my actions and tried to make them not so scary...plz forgive me...and you may continue reading wat is written below.
if you all noe, those from my class who stayed back today doin ayob's thing...i was actin funny for a period of time, where i started laughin uncontrolably and doin some funny actions. i am not sure when and how it started...but i noe that i was feelin a bit down and low at that point of time and den the "something" suddenly hit me. i could see wat i was doin but i didnt noe why i did them. in my opinion, it was becasue the "something" wanted to let everyone that was around noe about its presense and by me doin funny things was a way it did it...and it did worked...cause it scared or freaked two of my classmates...sian lee and nizam...i could see that they were quite freaky but i could stop myself then cause it came to a shock to me...and i wasnt prepared... and sian lee i think freak out or something...she went away...as some of you maight have seen... she left the table and went to work on another table....i still remember the stare that she gave me and that she was feelin very upset... nizam was oso feelin freaky and ordered me to stopped doin those funny actions...but the move of seat of sian lee really bought me back to the real world and i realized that i was not myself....thanx sina lee and oso i am very very very sorry to you and nizam for my actions...i did saw that i was doin them but i couldnt really stopped myself...i think that the move by sian lee make that "something" realized that wat he...i mean a HE...i will tell u about him later...that he had done enuff damage and left me...i think or stopped me doin funny things... again i am really sorry for scarin u all... den after sina lee left...i felt really weird and funny... my heart was beattin very fast to slow den fast to slow...i was feelin a bit dizzy and my body suddenly felt cold and like a breeze went pass me...even thought i was indoor in an air con room...funny?...hmmm...den i oso felt tired really tired as some of you saw that i was yawnin away later...and that i was oso feelin thirsty an went to grab my water bottle after beizi took it from me...i was thinkin funny....a lot of things were goin through my mind...i asked that "something" why did he choose me? why did he do this to me? wat did he want for me? why was he like this? and all the possible quesetions you can ask that "something"...i am not sure whether anot that did he reply me or that was it my own thinknin and reasonin that sovled and answered the questions...i will tok about that later.... anyway after that when i went back to my normal self ...i think...my palms started to get sweaty and i started to feel cold...hmmm...and i just continue doin my work... i noe that some of you from the class this nite said i look funny and weird ...i hope i answered your questions...thanks for your care and concern...i noe u all meant good but haiz.... anyway sorry helena for scarin you abit on the MRT train...i didnt mean to ....thanks anyway for being there... i noe that i may have left some points out about my experience but i thinked that the main points are there... now i will talk about that "something"...
That "something" i think that u all noe by now was a ghost...haiz i didnt believed but i guessed it was true...lucky it didnt done much harm to me...thank you for that...
i think that he was a boy...i studyin in my course or a design course...and he is about my age...if you all heard all the gohst in the room 207 i think...the one that we had leesons with jun kiat...ya that one...when i closed my eyes and focused i saw the scene of that room....where he was standin...he was standin in a corner of that room...lookin down...most likely feelin sad and down like me...and maybe that is why he reached out to me...i saw a white figure standin at that corner i think is the one with the big box and the end of the class...maybe i was just imagin that he was standin there but that is wat i saw...i can feel that he was a loner in the class...he didnt felt right bein there...he was always left out and all you noe all the bad things that will happen...but he was just standing there...he oso got move along the corridor of the studio and the DMD drawing studio...the area there...there is where i only saw him travelin to...other than that i couldnt feel and saw him movin...i couldnt see his face...but i think it is a guy....i dont noe how he died...wat happen to him and all..but i do noe that he was lonely den and now he wants ppl to noe about his pressense there and that he may not feel as lonely as he was before...and i think that he wanted me to tell everyone out there that there is sometihng there in the room and he is it...
if you think i am makin all of these up just to scare you all, den that is your choice...but i still feel that there is something out there called ghost and even though i noe i was sent to earth to help ppl...maybe i was sent down to do more than that...to help them....like wat i am doin now...
I am really really very very sorry for worryin you all who were scared by me and freaked by me...i think and believed that i am a little psyhic...and when writin this right now i am feelin much comfortable...and something just made me felt funny....that is oso why i can see things...like when i said that i felt something is goin to happen..and it did...hmmm....maybe i am really a bit psyhic...i dun really noe....
anyway i do believed in horoscope and my horoscope for today said that i will have the ability to locate a lost artticle ...the "something"?....and that emoitions tends to dominate...socal activities are high-lighted and i could be the suject of the "surprise party"....and that a Sagittrius will figure prominently...which is i think beizi....hmmm....anyway this is really wat the horoscope wrote and i think it is quite true ...dont you?
Okay i think i will end my blog and account of my encounter here..but lastly i would like to say a BIG very very very sorry to all who were scared and freaked out by me....like sian lee, nizam, and helena...i am so sorry...i am not like that usually...it is just that today was one of those days.....haiz i am so sorry.
Sorry.
JooL at 11:40 PM
2 comments